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Name: Dawn
Gender: Female


Interests: Xanga-ing.
Expertise: I'm an expert at everything, didn't you know?
Occupation: PRO.HOE.
Industry: LOVE.MAKiN.


Message: message me
AIM: sweetcococandy97


Member Since: 12/13/2006

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SerenaDante
aumshinrikyo
CaKaLusa
autisable@autisable
teamalice
ireallylikefood@ireallylikefood
brokenbindings2
justfinethanku
TheTheologiansCafe
mendicantmelly
SladeTheGreyFox
lefthandedtoons
xDeonnax
hippielifestyle
The_Mopo_976
absolutangel64
mrtopflite
AnchorsAwayx
its11_11
curtainsopen
GreekPhysique
JasonJacked
SoundofSapphire
TheJoyfulCynic
vanedave
twogirls_onehomo
TheMarriedFreshman
antisoccermom
xNicolax
mahboobiesHURT
lotta_valdez
ecoutezmonhistoire
creativewriting104
theblackspiderman
merriej
AirForceVirgin
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diamondwaste
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d_m_riggs
NEIL_FORREAL
ikilledsanity
entendezmavoix

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"Your" does not mean "You are"
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I Have A Secret Xanga
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young and unjustifiably cynical
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Monday, November 21, 2011

Its like no one knows anything is wrong

I'm struggling by myself. trying to keep myself afloat. I contemplate suicide daily. There are so many things in my life going wrong. My family is falling apart. my mother's health is going back down again. my grandmother is getting older. And I'm busy working on other people's problems so I don't have to deal with my own. No one sees my drowning. No one sees how poorly my grades are this semester. No one understands how much I cry by myself and how much I want to be done with every little thing. How I hate eating because it makes me feel fat, how I hate making myself throw up because I feel like I'm crazy, how I hate wanting to cut myself but not being able to because I know SOMEONE will find out. How I hate everything right now. I have no one on my side. People who THINK they're there for me aren't. They listen for a min and go "oh thats too bad" then focus on their own issues- but no one genuinely gives a shit like I give about other people. I will see someone, who is barely my friend, struggling and truly want to do anything I can to help them. I'm lost. I want this all to be over. I want to fall asleep and not wake up. But I'm too proud to leave knowing that everyone will think I was crazy. But maybe I am crazy- and I'm just worried that people will one day find out the truth.


Thursday, July 21, 2011

Online Shopping

Okay, I'm not sure if I'm the only young adult female who experiences problems with this but I have trouble finding really good online places to shop. I detest malls, and there's also a certain satisfaction with receiving a package in the mail addressed to you with cute new goodies inside.

Here's my list:

Ardenb.com

Express.com

Forever21.com

shopnastygal.com [Nasty Gal]

charlotterusse.com

Lulus.com

alloy.com

agacistore.com [A'Gaci]

delias.com
use to be my place... eh. they're slacking on they're cute stuff lately. Bright colorful, a little young.

makemechic.com

gojane.com

1015store.com

papayaclothing.com [papaya]

dollhouse.com

theurbanapparel.com

 


Tuesday, July 19, 2011

She Handled Her Charm With Time & Slight of Hand


Tuesday, July 12, 2011

what the hell, I guess I'm back

I left Xanga because I lost sight of the point. My petty little drama. My melodramatic bullshit. My suburban life full of banal silly trivialities plastered on the internet for no one to read. I felt so insignificant, and inconsiquential. But this past year; My freshman year of college opened my eyes. Who gives a fuck who reads this, I don't. I don't wear my heart on my sleeves, I wear it on my fingertips. And I've been suffocating. 

 

So, I'm back. I've been blogging on Xanga for five years, and yep... I still think I was made wrong. But its a little different now. 

I'm a mis-minted coin. Although I've got my flaws, its my flaws that make me rare & in a dull lifeless setting where society turns my young adult cohorts into vapid turds in their designer faux retro, my individuality is what makes me so valuable.


Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Udoli 2010

So I love anime & the cute style that goes along with it. With the anime-Japanese-thing comes several styles; theres an entire subculture that I've just found and am truly just unearthling.  I'm only three years into this and one year truly loving it! 


I am here to teach you the vocabulary that I've learned:


anime: Japanese cartoons, a special distinctive type of artwork. Its noticeable and has produced a wide following. In anime the facial expressions are exaggerated, and the viewer can visually see the thoughts and expressions on a character. 

anime eyes: known for their eyes, the anime eyes are big, distinctive and full of emotion.

otaku: Someone with obsessive interests like anime, manga or video games... <3

Fanboys & Fangirls: otaku has produced Faboys & girls. Those are basically individuals who are obsessed with a particular subject. It has also evolved into a style.

I Love Anime postcards

manga: comic book with anime japanese style artwork.

Hentai: Anime Porn

Conventions: Where fans come together and engage in activities related to their interests. In North Carolina we have Animazement, where I met my boyfriend back in 2009.

Cosplay: Individuals dress up as their favorite characters for conventions and photoshoots. Its the experience of "being someone else" that really makes it fun.

Camera whores: Here, like in any subculture people like attention, thus develops the picture whores.

J-Pop & Rock/ K-Pop & Rock: Japanese & Korean rock and pop music that really has a HUGE following.

Raver: Associated with the whole anime scene are RAVES! huge, awesome, techno parties! Yes, they are typically where drugs like Ecstasy and speed and other uppers are found, but its more about the music and letting your body rock. Where people become creatures of the night.

Cyber Goth: A style of raver that can wear all sorts of accoutrement like fuzzy leg muffs and net gloves, short skirts, crazy hair, etc but maintaining the gothic dark feel. There is also cyber punk and just plain gothic style.



Lolita: gothic lolita, sweet lolita, cosplay lolita, etc. 

Chibi: Japanese means small child which is a type of anime, characters that are drawn to be cute and small

Yuri: Love between women in an anime, Lesbianism.

Yaoi: Love between men in an anime.

Kawaii: Japanese for cute. 

Ulzzang: "best face" the stereotypical is the pale face thin nose, large eyes.

Desu: "it is", which is usually used as an emphasis at the end of a sentence in cutezie way

Udoli: African "best face". It means "Doll" in Zulu that love the doll like version of using feathers , animal prints , Tribal prints of African and Native Americans.

Now I've tried my hand at the new Udoli 2010:

I got my information from: http://udoli.webs.com/

Bachiko


An extreme form of Udoli. Very classy and enjoy keeping up a wealthy appearance. Bronzer is used to obtain a natural glow to their skin. They love looking fabulous shouldn't break your bank account. 


Amahle


A doll to the very letter, nothing make these girls happier than dressing up and feeling feminine. It's very rare to see the Udoli with pants, but for those who prefer them, slacks and knickers are the best option. They still have a hold on their child hood, while they have more elegant tea parties these days it should be no surpise to see stuffed animals with these Udoli.


Mandla


Most Mandla aren't girly, but still have a charm that's hard to resist. These Udoli usually have a bite to follow the bark, but they don't feel the need to be over bearing and threatening. Reserved, but unpredictable, and sometimes a little strange. They have fun with androgyny confusing all around them. Always take a second look, that girl in the tattered skirt may just be a boy, getting a kick out of messing with your mind.



Lulamtoti


An Udoli that has a very simple and sweet style, they are more laid back with their fashion yet still retain the look of a doll Love pulling simple outfits together, but always look great doing it. Effortless fashion and easygoing Udoli. They wear simple makeup, but it's not something they fuss about. A five minute face is all they need and they're good to go.



Xuba

Edgy, stylish and oh so adorable but they make it look so effortless. They draw inspiration from every where, and are best friends with the rainbow. They're energetic. They too hold on to some of their childhood and love toys, usually something they can play with. They enjoy music just as much as Mandla do 


Insikamuntu

The term is combined of two words and basically means animal person. No matter which style you choose, you can be an Insikamuntu, whether it's as simple as wearing a pair of ears on your head or doing extreme makeup and anything in between. These Udoli often use more animalistic poses and and gestures.


 



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